#65: Toronto Zoo Officials To Separate Same Sex Penguins; Penguins Everywhere Pressured to Stay Inside Their Heterosexual Caves.




I'm debuting my journalistic career via the blog, on some pretty hard hitting controversial subjects.  My first topical debate?  The hot button issue regarding the union of same-sex penguins at the Toronto Zoo.

As you may have already known, the Toronto Zoo has stated that they will be separating two penguins - Buddy (21), and  Pedro (10) - who have been involved in a serious bromance over the years, resulting in speculations about the couples sexual orientation. (Although there really seems to be no contest here, just look at how well-dressed they are).  This debate has been compounded by Brett Ratner's recent homophobic slur, that cost him his position producing the Academy Awards.  All and all, it hasn't been an easy week for the gays.  The issue has received a great deal of press over the past few days, and arguments are being made for both sides.


On one hand, some members of the public are outraged that the zoo is trying to separate the birds, who clearly enjoy each others companionship, being social animals believed to experience emotions similar to humans.  Haven't you seen "March of the Penguins"?! Or "Happy Feet"?!?! 

On the other hand, the zoo defends itself by saying that these penguins aren't necessarily involved in a sexual relationship, and that the inseparable penguins must be set apart in order to mate with other female penguins, to save their endangered species.

"Although they do not have a sexual relationship, Buddy and Pedro have been inseparable since meeting in an all-male group of penguins at a zoo in Toledo"  (The Toronto Star).

In response to criticisms:

"We’re quite happy to ignore all that,” said Tom Mason, the zoo’s curator of birds, laughing.
As it turns out, some things are bigger than the ambiguous love between two male penguins. The survival of a species, for instance.
 

Likely excuse Toronto Zoo...and "Tom Mason", if that's his real name.  Surely "curator of birds" is an invented position, that he uses to cover his true job description: killer of love birds.  He may be trying to "save the population" but at what cost, Mason? Love?!  This is clearly another attempt to censor unconventional love as part of the anti-gay agenda.  Their cold and calculating logic attempts to create a protective shield surrounding their latent homophobia, not to mention homo-eroticism.

This is a classic example of a paternal, and therefore, phallic institution, flexing its muscle against mother nature.  On the surface, the zoo may appear to be a non partial party, but it is an educational facility used to showcase mankind's illusion of control over natural life - man as the protector and "keeper" of other species.  This sick son of a bitch gets off on charging admission to show off its inhabitants like ani...circus freaks.  Sorry if any circus freaks were offended by that last statement.

The truth is that even if Buddy & Pedro don't have a sexual relationship (that we know of), they are still in love, and if they've been inseparable for years, being the social animals that they are, they will feel and remember heartbreak, mourn the loss, and eventually DIE.  Buddy and Pedro are life partners, and shouldn't be forced to separate because "the man" - aka TOM MASON - either hates romance, or even worse, doesn't believe in "Bros before Hoes", and vice versa.  Because really, what's the point in living and creating life at all - whether you are a man, woman, human, penguin, or whatever - if you aren't allowed to be with and love who you want to love?

Disclaimer: female penguins, Farai (3), and Thandiwey (4), are probably not hoes, it was just an expression.  The real bad guy is Tom Mason.


Second Disclaimer: I know nothing about Tom Mason, and my accusations are directed towards a character I envision with a dastardly looking moustache, laughing maniacally in a room full of birds forced into cages, where they are expected to reproduce for his sick pleasure.  It's probably nothing like that in real life though.  There's only a 50 % chance he has a moustache.
Arianne TongComment