Being an Adult Sucks, in the Sexiest Way.

Top 5 Things That Suck About Adulthood

1.) Nobody Wants To Give You A Job.

If you want anything, you have to fight tooth & nail to get it.  You aren't a baby anymore, and if you want the bottle, mommy is not going to give it to you.  You are going to have to grow some balls real or metaphorical, get up, and get it for yourself.  Being a spoiled brat for most of my life, gathering the strength to do anything for myself has been a challenge.  Don't get me wrong, it's not that I can't, it's that I don't want to.

However, practice makes perfect, and the more I try to become a self-sustaining individual, the more I succeed at it.  So one fine day, all my perseverance will have paid off in the form of my dream job...salary! Booyah!

2.) You Have to Go to the Doctor, Because All of a Sudden, Everything Hurts

There used to be a time where I could bounce back from just about anything and not even bat an eyelash.  I can take a lot of pain compared to the average person, and the fact that I'm starting to experience pains that are less than normal for me is heartbreaking and disillusioning.

If I could describe myself in one word it would be strength, physical and emotional strength.  It deeply concerns me when that strength is brought into question because it's what I've based my entire identity on.  Now I have a whole host of bodily concerns.  I have to pay attention to the way I run so that I don't have to spend the next 3 days icing my knees.  I have to stretch every morning so that my neck won't seize with pain.  You have to ask your doctor about every single thing that isn't normal because you don't want to take the chance that it's Cancer.

Fucking Cancer. 

Long story short, going the paediatrician was so much easier.  You're mommy made appointments for you, drove you there, it took five minutes to wait and then you were out in another ten minutes with a lollipop.  Now, you have to call and fight for your appointment, drive yourself there, sit in the waiting room for 2 hours with miserable and unkempt looking people who had to bring their 5 kids with them because they couldn't find or couldn't afford a babysitter, and finally go in to see your family doctor with your grocery list of health concerns, only for him to say I'm fine after vaguely looking me over for all of 10 minutes, asking how old I am, if I've found a job yet (NO. OKAY?! STOP ASKING!), and asking if I've had sex in the last 3 months, and give me a sympathetic, yet skeptical and judging look when I sigh and answer, "...no." ...STOP ASKING. Oh, and instead of a lollipop, you get a nifty piece of paper to show your pharmacist.  Riveting stuff.

3.) You Have to Plan Things.

There's no curriculum when you're out of school bitches.  So be prepared that once your ass has that diploma, you are all on your own.  No course credits to get, no prerequisites to obtain.  If you have no goals, you'll never do anything or get anywhere.  So, like I suggested in #1, grow some balls and plan something even if it's tentative.  Just like University, what you start off with might not be necessarily where you end up. 

4.) You have to Adhere to a Budget.

 ...Fuck.

5.) You're Biological Time Clock Starts Ticking, Because You're Mom Tells You That These Are You're PRIME Child-Bearing Years.

...Fuck!

Top 5 Things That Are Sexy About Adulthood

1.)  You Can Go Anywhere

Not all of being an adult sucks.  It's not like when you are a kid and everyone is monitoring your whereabouts, wondering where the hell you are at 11PM, and why you aren't home

that very instant!

You can decide where you want to go, and what you want to do, and no one can stop you without good reason.  If you can go out with who ever you want to, dress however you want to dress, and be whoever you want to be and no one but yourself can stop you.  I think that after you reach a certain age you ...

2.)  You Are Old Enough To Make Informed Decisions and Think For Yourself

The things you do when you are younger, you do because you aren't really a fully formed person.  You are still in your primary formative years and are forming opinions of yourself and others, and creating an identity.  For this reason, I don't consider teenagers human beings.  Teenagers just need to be left alone, while parents operate under the guise of having any power whatsoever.  Parents need to be assholes to their teenagers, but also understand that teenagers are just going to do whatever the hell they want anyways.  The difference between being a teenager and an adult is that once you are over that stage, the parental nagging stops, and so does the sneaking around and coordinating stories

Not only that, but being told how you should feel about certain subjects is left in the past, because you have an opinion about it - your own opinion.  That is the most freeing thing in the world.

3.)  People Take You Seriously.

Booyah!

4.)  You Don't Have To Pull Grueling All-Nighters To Study, Think & Write About Things That You Will Never Remember 15 Minutes After You've Handed It In.

Booyah!

5.)  If You Let Yourself, You Can Have More Fun Than Ever Before.

Even though adulthood is so much different and comes with a lot more responsibility than being a kid, I believe that there is always a way to make the best of any situation. So, there has to be a way to make adulthood fun! 

I used to believe that things always had to balance out - that if you had one thing, you couldn't have something else, because it would be too much, and you would just be too strained; I used to believe that we couldn't have it all.  Then I thought back on the last 365 days and thought that that was total bullshit.  We can have it all, we just have to want it to work.

This year I had a full course load, and wanted to get the best grades I ever got, ever. Got it. 

I also wanted to work 3 jobs so that I could save some money for after graduation, whatever I'd end up doing. Did it.  

I wanted to spend more time with my family than ever before. Did it, and I'm so grateful I did. 

I wanted to date, a lot. Check. 

I wanted to have a social life - to have friends, and best friends. Made it happen, Booyah!

The point of this is to prove to you, and myself, that even though times are tough and the conflicting interests in life seem to be insurmountable, the things you want in life manage to shine through and work when you will them to work.  You can have between the lines of adulthood, and there are always people and opportunities that with make life just a little bit extra-magical.

Arianne TongComment